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From the creative mind of Lauren Faust…

The woman who specializes in making cartoons for little kids that adults watch when no one’s looking…

And Hasbro…

A toy company so shameless is created a TV network that is nothing but an advertisement for their products…

Comes the most mind-boggling, inexplicable, and totally illogical production ever to spawn a massive, cult-like fan base since “The Rocky Horror Picture Show”…

MY LITTLE PONY: FRIENDSHIP IS MAGIC

Enter the fantastic and magical land of Equestria…

A world where life is literally so perfect that the citizens can control the weather, what plants and animals grow and live in it, when seasons come and go, and even when day and night occurs…

And is populated by three races of technicolor ponies…

Unicorns…

Who can perform great acts of magic with their horns…

Pegasi…

Who can fly, live on clouds, and manipulate the weather…

And Earth Ponies…

Who can’t do anything cool or interesting, and so have been subjugated into the lowest social class of their society. Seriously, all they’re expected to do is farm.

As well as every creature listed in the Monster Manual v.2 from “Dungeons and Dragons”, like…

Griffons…

Hydras…

Manticores…

Chimeras…

Dragons…

Cockatrices…

Phoenixes…

And Wendigos…wait, no…that’s spelled “Windigos”…

…Seriously? All those others and they gave a “kid-show” spelling to that one?

Meet the Mane Six and join them on their adventures as they learn the true message of the series…

Friendship is Six Different Types of Insanity!

Twilight Sparkle…

A neurotic, obsessive-compulsive overachiever…

Applejack…

An inferiority complex prone to violent mood swings…

Rainbow Dash…

A chronic exerciser with ADD…

Rarity…

A bipolar, self-obsessed autogynephiliac…(Look it up)

Fluttershy…

An anti-social recluse who gets abused by her animals and, in turn, abuses those who care about her…

And Pinkie Pie!

An ADHD, delusional, schizophreniac psychopath who has been progressively growing more demented each new season…which is pretty creepy.

Six of the best friends in the world who model just how different girls can be without needing to conform to traditional gender stereotypes…

And…as a result have appeared in more lesbian fanfiction than pretty much any other fandom.

Join Twilight Sparkle as her mentor, the all-powerful goddess Princess Celestia…

Whose powers include raising the sun every day and…er…uh…um…sitting on her throne and getting Twilight to clean up her past mistakes at least once a season…

Manipulates her using the old “favorite student” line into doing all of her work for her…including things that one would expect a goddess of Equestria to do such as defeating other gods and defending her country…for three seasons…

Until she eventually decided to “cut out the middleman” and just made Twilight Sparkle a goddess too at the third Season Finale…

When she’s not being Celestia’s “garbage collector”, she’ll learn all about friendship with the help of her new friends in a mixture of episodes that range from subtle underpinnings to morals that slapped you over the head five minutes in…

Let’s see…everyone in town is scared of a zebra wearing tribal jewelry who is the only character on the entire show voiced by an African-American. I wonder what theme this episode is going to address…

Which teaches children many lessons about being a good friend…as well as many other lessons that are not-so-explicit, like…

Women are vicious harpies if you force them to be in the same room together… (“Look Before You Sleep”)

Men do whatever women want just to get them to be shut up… (“A Dog and Pony Show”)

You really don’t want to know what your friends do behind your back… (“Party of One”)

It’s possible to completely forget about your best friend’s birthday while spoiling yourself on their expense and to get away with it… (“Sweet and Elite”)

Just because you train really, really hard doesn’t mean you’ll ever be good at athletics… (“Hurricane Fluttershy”)

Never let your enemies live… (“Magic Duel”)

Family reunions always suck… (“Apple Family Reunion”)

You have to play favorites with those in charge to get anywhere in your career… (“Wonderbolt Academy”)

Celebrities are a-holes if you meet them in real life… (“Daring Don’t”)

Your family really doesn’t care for your friends… (“Maud Pie”)

Society lets a few people who get offended way too easily ruin things for the majority… (“The Last Roundup”)

And forcing people to fall in love is bad… (“Hearts and Hooves Day”) …unless, of course, you use magic. (“A Canterlot Wedding”)

This is why Faust never wanted Princess Cadance as a character…

And prepare yourself for adventure as they use the power of friendship to battle horrible villains like…

Nightmare Moon…

Who was everyone’s favorite female cartoon character until “Frozen” introduced Elsa…

Discord…

The most successful blantant ripoff of a live-action TV character since Fred Flintstone…

Chrysalis…

Who single-handedly manage to salvage the Season Two finale by masking the fact it was simply an excuse to market wedding-themed merchandise…

King Sombre…

Who…nobody really liked…

And Tirek…

Who, after four seasons, is only the second character from the G1 Series to appear on the show (other than Spike)…

(Wait…doesn’t he kind of look like Trigon from “Teen Titans”? And Tara Strong did the voice of Raven on that one and she does the voice of Twilight Sparkle too… Someone please tell me I’m not the only guy who thought that was ironic.)

Marvel at the mystery of how a show geared toward the youngest potential demographic, along with things like Dora the Explorer and Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, somehow managed to gain a nerd fanbase that rivals Trekkers and Whovians…by ripping off of every other nerd fandom at every opportunity, including…

Dungeons and Dragons…

Star Trek…

Doctor Who…

Star Wars…

…and…The Big Lebowski?!

(DUDE! Pony John Turturro is walking around in that bowling alley!)

And, in turn, infects every other fandom it can find…like…

Team Fortress 2…

Skyrim…

Final Fantasy VI…

Creepypasta…

And every convention in the country!

Delve into the show that Bronies love to watch…and non-Bronies are terrified to watch…because they know every current Brony used to say the exact same things they currently say about the show before they started to watch it and became “part of the herd”…

(JOIN…US…)

Enjoy all four marvelous seasons…rather easily considering how often they’ve been pirated and put all over YouTube!

Season One… The season that started us all and reintroduced the franchise with all new loveable, entertaining characters…

Season Four… The first season with an overarching plot that had an explosive season finale that pushed the envelope on the “Y” rating…

Season Two… The season with Emmy-award winning songs and catchy tunes mixed with amazing plotlines…

And…Season Three.

…which most fans wish the creators would have devoted more time to instead of “Equestria Girls”.

(Ugh, why does Twilight Sparkle look like she landed in the “Doug” universe?)

And enjoy the rich number of fan-loved background ponies…all thirty of whom have been used to generate all 870 possible shippings in fanfiction!

STARRING…

Everypony’s Favorite Princess… (Princess Luna)

Nopony’s Favorite Princess… (Princess Celestia)

Every Fourth Female in American Cartoons… (Twilight Sparkle [Voiced by Tara Strong])

The Blue Angels… (The Wonderbolts)

Karl Lagerfield… (Hoity Toity)

Lady Gaga… (Rarity in “Sonic Rainboom”)

Anna Wintour… (Photo Finish)

Walt Disney Logo… (Princess Celestia going over Canterlot in “Best Night Ever”)

Q… (Discord)

Harry Potter’s Thestrals… (Chariot pullers in “Luna Eclipsed”)

The Dude… (Bowling Alley in “The Cutie Pox”)

Darkwing Duck… (“The Mysterious Mare Do Well”)

“Trainspotting” nightmare baby… (“Baby Cakes”)

Solid Snake… (Twilight in “It’s About Time”)

The Joker…or is it Doctor Octopus? (The Mane-iac)

Slenderman… (“Pinkie Apple Pie”…and now you have something new to look up)

Hunter S. Thompson…(Discord in “Three’s A Crowd”)

Weird Al Yankovic… (Cheese Sandwich)

And Double Dare! (Pinkie Pie’s obstacle course in “Maud Pie”)

MY LITTLE PONY: FRIENDSHIP IS MAGIC!

Yeah, we bronies get a lot of flak for our fandom, but the theme of the show is love and tolerance, so “tolerators going to tolerate!”

…Unless you make fun of Fluttershy. Then we will f***ing kill you.

 

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