My Little Devotional #150: “Who’s Afraid?”

Tags

anxiety, assurance, Bible, Christian Life, Christianity, confidence, devotional, doubt, Dragonlord Ember, faith, fear, God, inspirational, Jesus, King Thorax, motivational, My Little Pony, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, New Testament, obsession, Old Testament, promise, Spike, Triple Threat, worry

Inspiration for Today’s Devotional: “Triple Threat”

Spike was a dragon under a lot of stress in this episode. He went to extreme lengths to welcome Dragonlord Ember as the ambassador of Equestria to try and keep peace with the dragon race, only in his focus he completely forgot he had invited King Thorax of the Changelings over on the exact same day. He feared the two would have such clashing personalities that they would not only hate each other but would start a war between their respective races, and devoted most of the day to try and keep them apart. Yet as a result of this, he ended up almost causing them to really get in a fight when they finally spotted one another and misinterpreted each other’s actions. On top of that, they ended up angry at him for his gesture showing what he thought of their respective personalities. In the end it turned out that the two were able to help each other with their own respective problems, and that if Spike hadn’t let his fears get hold of him things would have worked out far more easily.

As I’ve stated before, one of the biggest “internal enemies” both Christians as well as all other faiths and non-religious folks have to deal with is fear. Unlike some churches and sermons, I feel a little fear is a good thing as it, like all other emotions, is created by God. Certainly one won’t argue that we should have fear of God; at least in the sense of respect, reverence, and awe of his power. And many people in the Bible, especially in the Old Testament, could have done well with a bit more fear of God (namely everyone who ignored any of his warnings). But even discounting that, fear is necessary for a lot of life. As children, if we didn’t have fear of being stung, bit, burned, cut, or electrocuted, we’d wander into a lot of dangerous situations. As adults, if we didn’t have fear of laws and for our own lives, we’d be more apt to do things such as drive recklessly, overindulge in alcohol, get into fights with strangers, or go about a promiscuous lifestyle with unknown people. Obviously, there’s a lot of dangers in this world, and many of them we can’t afford to get “hit” by once to learn better. We need to fear and respect them now.

Yet like all things God has granted us, fear can be misapplied, and I hardly need to go into detail about that. Past hurt, phobias, and paranoia are all examples of sources of fear that can keep us crippled and unable to function as normal human beings. Yet fear dictates almost all of our actions even in day-to-day life. If we find ourselves treating one group of people different from another, it ultimately boils down to fear. We see a difference between the two groups that ultimately makes us scared of one more than the other. If we don’t donate or volunteer, it again comes to fear. Fear that we don’t have enough time for ourselves, fear that the money will be wasted, fear that the organization is crooked, etc. If we don’t want to witness to this or that person, fear once again comes into play–fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of humiliation…the list is endless. These types of fear are not healthy and limit us as Christians and as human beings.

It was Denis Waitley who once said: “What the mind dwells upon, the body acts upon.” This can be both good and bad; depending on what, exactly, the mind dwells upon. If we constantly dwell on our fears, as Spike did in this episode, we will eventually act in accord with them. Rather than trust his friends, much less realized how they could have helped one another, Spike tried to keep them apart in this whole episode to his own detriment. But in more concrete, real-world terms… If we constantly distrust people, we won’t try to outreach to them. If we fear being cheated or lied to, we won’t donate to anyone or let anyone in to our lives. If we constantly fear rejection, we’ll never witness or try anything important. And just like Spike, once we let fear take hold in our minds we’ll just keep going over it again and again mentally and make it worse until it dominates all aspects of our thinking.

As one who struggles with anxiety and fear, I know this all too well. I’ve spent restless nights and had my weekends ruined from constant fear (usually irrational), or wasted time I could have spent with my family or doing something for other people because I spent too much time being fearful. When it becomes a learned response, as it did for me, it’s very hard to get rid of and, to this day, I’m still trying.

Small wonder that the Bible emphasizes the importance of keeping a sound mind as well as a sound spirit. “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” (Philippians 4:8) “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” (Romans 12:2) “Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” (Psalm 139:23-24)

Whenever I feel myself stricken and even crippled by fear and anxiety, I try to keep in mind two important Bible verses.

“Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?” (Luke 12:25-26)

This one is very poignant. Many of us, in our zeal to be responsible and to think of things soberly, have gone the extra step and now feel worrying about something is actually doing something about it. It doesn’t. As my own pastor has recently pointed out, the only thing worrying ever changes is ourselves–making us slaves to our own obsessions and fears. We have to remind ourselves that sitting around being fearful accomplishes absolutely nothing.

And for the second…

“There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” (1 John 4:18)

As the Bible has said, God knows all of our concerns before we voice them, and he knows what we need. He has vowed to be with us at all times and to see us through everything. To claim to follow God and yet live a life of fear means we aren’t truly following God, because we haven’t learned to have faith in him yet. In all my times of worry, desperation, and fear, I sometimes have to stop, concentrate, and tell myself and all my inner feelings that God is in control and he will see me through as he has every other time I have been in distress. And I need to keep focusing on that until my belief in that overrides my fears.

In closing for today, I’d like to share Jesus’ own words from the Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 6:25-34):

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?

“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”

Suggested Prayer: “Lord God, thank you that I am valuable in your eyes and that you know my needs even before I bring them to you, even when I feel I am abandoned. And thank you for your Word, which testifies again and again that no one need fear who trusts in you. When my own fears threaten to choke me and, especially, prevent me from living in accordance with your Will, let me cling to your Word and Promise and let it cast out all fear within me. Gratefully in Jesus’ Name, Amen.”

Advertisements

My Little Devotional #149: “Open to Misinterpretation”

Tags

Applejack, bias, Bible, Christian Life, Christianity, devotional, evangelism, false accusation, Fame and Misfortune, Fluttershy, God, inspirational, intention, Jesus, motivational, motive, My Little Pony, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, New Testament, offense, Old Testament, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Twilight Sparkle

Inspiration for Today’s Devotional: “Fame and Misfortune”

In today’s episode, Twilight Sparkle hits on a new idea she hopes will help all ponies across Equestria with friendship problems by publishing the old friendship journal she and her friends used to keep up. Unfortunately, things soon turn disastrous as a result. It seems every pony in Equestria reads something “different” into it. One misinterprets Rarity as being completely self-centered and mean. Another misinterprets everything Pinkie Pie says as funny. Still another demands that Fluttershy justify all of her individual negative character traits. Yet another thinks Rainbow Dash is “better” than everyone else…and so on and so forth. In the course of doing so, everypony misses the point of the journal completely. It’s only a pair of small fillies who end up getting what the journal was going for out of everyone else in Ponyville.

Unlike most other Christians, I believe that our society needs some measure of “political correctness”. I feel everyone is entitled to at least some amount of respect, if for no other reason than that is the tradeoff for a polite society and obeying the Golden Rule. But political correctness has gone too far in modern times, as it’s no longer about showing respect to other people at all but a means of silencing people. In a world where everyone has grown to believe their opinion is worth more than it is, many people have reached the point where they feel they have a right not to “be offended”; as if being offended is somehow an act of external immorality on someone’s part.

It’s true that there are things that are put up with the explicit desire to offend people. Racial epitaphs or symbols, explicit imagery, or pure hate speak condemning a group of people…all of those are designed to incite anger and express hate. The problem is nowadays even the slightest thing that is unintentional can cause things to grind to a halt and demand for change. Wearing a Cat-in-the-Hat hat is suddenly racial. Game developers are suddenly offending an entire country if they use the wrong slang term on a sign in the background. Even the word “history” is suddenly gender biased because it says the word “his” in it. (Does that mean I have to say “ther” when I mean “this” now?)

As this episode illustrated, anyone can find anything wrong with what you say or do. They can always misrepresent it and claim a wrong motive. And nowadays, they can put that opinion everywhere and find like-minded individuals to say the same thing. Occasionally, it can get savage and mean. Yet the part that scares me is that, more often than not, people end up apologizing and changing to accommodate the people who complain. They catch themselves up in a never-ending cycle to “please everyone” and leave no one upset. That, unfortunately, is a dangerous precedent to follow. Yes, there are some things that genuinely do merit an apology. Yet to apologize for something that genuinely had no ill intent in it and try to change the world to accommodate the “offended” is essentially making everyone cater to their whims and, occasionally, their biases and imaginations. Especially if the person already has a mindset against something, for in that case no amount of apology or censorship will ever be sufficient. And for many people, they use that as a tool to completely silence all opposition period. After all, if “being offended” becomes an act of immorality itself, then you can shut down an opposing viewpoint for even existing.

Where does it end? At what point do we think something is so unreasonable that we tell someone, “I’m sorry, but that wasn’t my intention. You’ll just have to ignore it.”?

I don’t know if it will end any time soon, but there’s an important lesson we can learn from it right now. We should realize that someone will always, always, always see something wrong in what we say or do. If you’re a Christian witnessing the Gospel, that’s a given. We know it all too well. But they’ll do the same for everything else. Say you want to let some refugees into the country and you’ll be accused of promoting terrorism. Say you want to allow people to own guns and you’ll be accused of being a murderer. Say you’re against abortion and you’ll be accused of wanting to make women second-class citizens/slaves. Say that police acted inappropriately shooting an unarmed man to death and you’ll be accused of wanting lawlessness. Say that you voted for Donald Trump and you’ll be kicked out of your local YMCA (the last one actually did happen to my father after nearly 20 years of attendance and donations).

The important thing is not to care so much about what people say your motive is as to know what your motive is. Jesus was constantly accused of saying things that were all together untrue. “Jesus was driving out a demon that was mute. When the demon left, the man who had been mute spoke, and the crowd was amazed. But some of them said, “By Beelzebul, the prince of demons, he is driving out demons.”” (Luke 11:14-15) “A second time they summoned the man who had been blind. “Give glory to God by telling the truth,” they said. “We know this man[Jesus] is a sinner.”” (John 9:24) “The chief priests and the whole Sanhedrin were looking for false evidence against Jesus so that they could put him to death. But they did not find any, though many false witnesses came forward.” (Matthew 26:59-60a) It never stopped Him because He knew exactly what He was about and His intentions. After that, He left it up to whether some people would accept what He said and some people wouldn’t; and ultimately it was all about the people who would accept it. He never changed the message for the people that needed to hear it for the people who didn’t want to hear it at all.

Whenever you find yourself speaking boldly about something important and being assaulted for the wrong motive, always remember to be respectful and calm (for by getting angry and defensive you’re merely playing right into their hands), but so long as your motives are pure and true keep on going. Remember that it is inevitable that people will assign false motives to you. That’s life. Or, as Winston Churchill once said, “You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.” As with so many uncontrollable things in life, our response matters more than whether or not it will occur, which is why we should care more about what we say than how some people will react.

And for that reason, equally important is to also make sure our own hearts are in line at all times…both to make sure the words we speak are good as well as to avoid the sickness of distorting what we hear to suit our own agenda. As the Bible says, “A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.” (Luke 6:45) Therefore, let’s all make sure our hearts stay full of good things.

Suggested Prayer: “Lord God, thank you that your Word is right and true, and contains the ways of eternal life to all who are able to hear it with a clean heart and let it “bear fruit”. Whether I am proclaiming your Word, explaining a viewpoint, sharing advice, or admonishing someone, please let my motives always be pure and in tune with your Will. And when opposition inevitably comes, let my focus always be more on quality of my message over the whims of society. Gratefully in Jesus’ Name, Amen.”

My Little Devotional #148: “Time’s Up”

Tags

anger, Applejack, Bible, Christian Life, Christianity, devotional, God, Grand Pear, grudges, hate, inspirational, Jesus, motivational, My Little Pony, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, New Testament, Old Testament, Pear Butter, reconciliation, regret, The Perfect Pear, time, tomorrow

Inspiration for Today’s Devotional: “The Perfect Pear”

In one of the more sobering and emotional episodes of the entire series, we are treated to the story of Grand Pear, his daughter, Pear Butter, and her relationship and eventual marriage to Bright Macintosh. Pear Butter and Bright Mac came from opposite families on either side of a long-standing family rivalry and feud, and were forced to keep their relationship secret for years as they knew neither of their respective families would ever approve. When the secret was exposed to Grand Pear on the day of what was supposed to be a covert wedding, he demanded that his daughter choose either him and her family or that of her new husband. Forced into a position that broke her heart, Pear Butter ended up choosing to stay with Bright Mac, and as a result Grand Pear disowned her and left town without her.

Full of anger and bitterness, Grand Pear never saw Pear Butter or spoke to her again for her choice, separated both from her and his three grandchildren. One day, when he was now an old man, he learned the unfortunate news: she passed away while she was still young. And Grand Pear learned the sad truth that if he had ever wanted to see his daughter again he had lost his chance forever, and that he would live the rest of his life knowing the last things he ever said to her were words of rejection and anger.

And all because his grudge ended up being more important to him than his child.

The Bible says in Ephesians 4:26, “”In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry,”. As this episode makes abundantly clear, this instruction, like all instruction in the Bible, is not merely a warning against sin that leads to death but a stark warning of one of the biggest mistakes we can make with our lives. As the infamous proverb has said: “Holding a grudge is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.”

Grand Pear learned that lesson too late, and there are many people like him in the real world. I’ve known a few myself, and at times I wonder how much I emulate him.

Today’s message I feel is poignant and to the point, so I have little need to elaborate on it save to re-share this poem by Robert H. Smith.

“The clock of life is wound but once,
And no man has the power
To tell just when the hands will stop
At late or early hour.

To lose one’s wealth is sad indeed,
To lose one’s health is more,
To lose one’s soul is such a loss
That no man can restore.

The present only is our own,
So live, love, toil with a will,
Place no faith in “Tomorrow,”
For the Clock may then be still.”

Suggested Prayer: “Lord God, out of all the many blessings you have given me in my life, I thank you for the most precious of all: today. If there is good I can do, a wrong I can redress, a relationship I can rebuild, a chance to say I love you, or an opportunity to decide where I will spend eternity today, please give me the strength to do it now. Tomorrow is not guaranteed. Gratefully, in Jesus’ Name, Amen.”

My Little Devotional #147: “Down with the Sickness”

Tags

Bible, choices, Christian Life, Christianity, devotional, flaws, God, honesty, inspirational, Jesus, motivational, My Little Pony, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, New Testament, Old Testament, perspective, relationships, shortcomings, sickness, toxicity

Inspiration for Today’s Devotional: “Discordant Harmony”

In this rather interesting episode, Discord finds himself questioning if his normal chaotic behavior and demeanor might actually be putting Fluttershy off. To that end, when he invites Fluttershy to his house for tea, he makes an effort to make both himself and his surroundings as “normal” as possible to more suit what he presumes is her tastes. Only after he goes to excessive efforts to make himself totally average does he learn that Fluttershy, far from merely accepting him out of being a gracious and kind-hearted spirit, actually likes his chaotic and boisterous nature as it’s the opposite of everything she is–namely reserved and quiet.

There are many “common sense” maxims out there, and ironically many of them are untrue. One of the more popular ones is “opposites attract”. The truth is people are more usually drawn to others who are like themselves rather than the opposite of their nature. However, as this episode illustrated in a kinder and less severe nature than reality, people do tend to gravitate toward those who are a “match” for themselves and their own natures, and that’s not always a good thing.

This is seen all the time in relationships. One can probably guess that if someone is an addict, they will gravitate toward people who are, by their nature, enablers: individuals who mistake a need to constantly save people from their own self-destructive behaviors as compassion and kindness. They pair with them because they will allow their addiction to persist. Enablers, on the other hand, could be attracted to addicts due to a past where they were forced to watch someone they cared about be victimized and been unable to do anything about it, so that now they have to “save” others to make up for that. Likewise, relationships that are abusive often involve an element of low self-esteem on the part of the victim, where they submit to their tormentors out of feeling they “deserve” their torment, as well as the offender; where they don’t feel personal value unless they can “dominate” another individual.

Yet this sort of thing can happen, and does happen, in far less severe yet unhappy relationships. I know a certain individual who always “knows” the best way to do everything and sharply criticizes anyone who does things a different way. The reason is he’s insecure about himself and fearful of personal failure, so to make himself feel good about himself he has to constantly put down others and point out what’s wrong with what they’re doing. He’s unhappily married to a woman who is rather idle and shows little initiative or motivation for anything. It frustrates him to no end, and it has ever since their marriage. He’s quick (naturally) to blame her for everything that’s wrong in their relationship, but what he’s not realizing is the reason he married her in the first place was because she was an individual who has such an apathetic nature that she would just “take the abuse” no matter what, whereas anyone else would have never made that commitment or stood up for themselves. Both have a problem, and they ended up attracted to each other to make it worse.

Usually it’s not just one side to blame for relationship problems. It’s more often a situation of two unhealthy people projecting their symptoms onto each other and making each other more unhealthy. Quite simply…if we are sick, in the mental or emotional sense, and are not actively acknowledging and trying to correct it, we will be attracted to people who “feed our sickness”.

One of the key parts of Jesus’ ministry and His focal point for why He so easily came to the aid of sinners while the self-righteous received a stern condemnation was because the former group acknowledged their flaws and sought to repent and the latter group did not. He illustrated this in the following parable:

“Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’ 

“But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’

“I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.” (Luke 18:10-14)

And elsewhere:

“Some Pharisees who were with him heard him say this and asked, “What? Are we blind too?” Jesus said, “If you were blind, you would not be guilty of sin; but now that you claim you can see, your guilt remains.”” (John 9:40-41)

Instruction like this isn’t just to humble ourselves before God. We’re all “broken”, no matter which way you look at it. Everyone has some flaw. Yet only those who acknowledge them and seek help can correct them, and that’s important not only for miracle-working as Jesus did, but our own health and well being. Only to the degree that we are honest with ourselves can we be honest with other people. And so long as we go around not seeing what our own pasts or faults are and how they could be impacting us, we’ll continue to make bad choices based on our slanted world view–not only with who we form relationships with but with everything else.

If you want to be in a good relationship, start by becoming the sort of person you would like as a partner…not just “acting” like the sort of person you would like as a partner. For some of us, that might involve working a lot more on ourselves than on finding someone else, but the good news is to the degree that we ourselves are healthy and mature, so naturally will be the quality of our relationships–not only with others but also with God.

Suggested Prayer: “Lord God, thank you for your instruction regarding personal honesty, and your assurance that it is our true selves that you wish to hear from rather than us attempting to cover up for our faults or sins. Please grant that I will always have the courage and responsibility to examine myself from time to time and see what kind of person I am showing to the world and what I may be unknowingly attracting or gravitating to, and help me always to remember that I can’t change other people but I can always change myself and how I respond to them. Gratefully in Jesus’ Name, Amen.”

My Little Devotional #145: “I Know It When I See It”

Tags

A Royal Problem, assumption, Bible, Christian Life, Christianity, devotional, God, heart, inspirational, Jesus, judging, judgment, motivational, My Little Pony, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, New Testament, Old Testament, preconception, Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, sin, Starlight Glimmer, virtue, worth

Inspiration for Today’s Devotional: “A Royal Problem”

This episode was a fan favorite for a multitude of reasons, but what I think stuck out the most to me was it served as an opportunity to get into the characters of Princess Celestia and Princess Luna by having them in a conflict with one another. Both of them felt the the other wasn’t appreciating them enough for what they did every day although both had important, and demanding, jobs. Yet a key part of why they failed to appreciate each other was that either one felt the other had the “easy” job. That, as it turned out, was a rather bold claim for either one to make as they rarely were awake and alert for the other one’s job and really didn’t understand just how much the other one’s tasks entailed. That was fixed when Starlight Glimmer switched their Cutie Marks, letting them both “walk a mile in the other’s horseshoes”, and both realized just how much they carried out and appreciated each other much better for it.

One of the greatest criticisms that secular individuals have of Christianity is that they are very judgmental–that they feel they’re “better” than everyone else. I don’t think many Christians realize it’s not that hard for them to give that perception. We have the Bible, which we believe holds the answers to life’s greatest questions and the secrets to eternal life and knowing the nature and will of God, our Heavenly Father. And that can lead some Christians to get the sensation of already “knowing people” and circumstances without ever experiencing and interacting with them, and as a result they are in a secure spot to condemn and judge others without knowing them. The bad part about coming to the point where you feel confident to definitely declare all things good or evil is it leads to the sin of pride; placing yourself as the ultimate moral authority rather than God. It’s very easy to forget that we are still in the flesh and flawed by our own weaknesses and our own perceptions. Even if we feel we know enough to declare someone we see good or evil, we forget that we ourselves don’t see the world as it is to begin with but rather as we are. While there are definitely many issues I feel Christians can safely declare good or evil, and should, there are also some that they feel entitled to condemn simply from their own standpoint.

Case in point: I know a few people, and I suspect there are many more, who proudly profess their Christianity and boldly speak the Word. The problem is many of these people also profess other things; like how people on one side of a political discourse are always liars, lazy, fools, etc., or how in an issue of whether a crime was motivated by external factors such as race, gender, or religion they tend to always favor one race, gender, or religion over another. These, of course, are things of a more global or societal view. Yet judging people in their everyday lives comes even easier for others. They talk about how that one co-worker never does their job, or how that family member they won’t talk to thinks she’s so much better than everyone, or that this person’s child will grow up to be a delinquent because he doesn’t act like everyone else, or second guess that person’s motives all the time because he voted for one candidate and not another.

It may seem unfair to pick on Christians alone for doing this as everyone it guilty of it, but seeing as to be Christian is to realistically be held to a greater standard than the rest of the world, and we profess once a week that we will follow Jesus and be the light of the world (if not more than that), I feel it’s a fair critique.

The truth of the matter is who we truly are is between us and God. We might not be able to overlook sin regardless of motive behind it, but we should never assume we “know” a person just because of a circumstance we find them in…especially if we know little to nothing about that person to begin with. People don’t often choose where they want to be in life and never choose their background. (Just as an example, I’ve met a person before who seemed perfectly “normal” on the outside to the rest of the world, and confessed in their testimony that their birth mother attempted to murder them when they were a teen.) And even if they are in a situation by choice, it doesn’t mean they’re not working to get out of it; as many people who are recovering from addiction or have gotten out of prison try to do. Likewise, rarely does someone do something to be “mean” or because they know what they’re doing is wrong. There’s reasons behind things everyone does. Some of them might be good, some of them might be bad, and some might be ones we’d find ourselves making in the same situation.

Never forget Job. (There are a lot of lessons to be learned in that book simply besides why good people suffer.) If even the most righteous man alive could find himself continuously being accused of evil by his own friends, a man who not only prayed and fasted but had clear evidence of his own good works that everyone knew, then how much more will we be prone to judge people who don’t meet our own standards? (Likewise, don’t forget that God found those same friends guilty of sin who thought they were defending God all along.) (Job 42:7-9)

The point being–we can judge actions and make responses to those, and there is something to be said about how must trust to give someone; but, as the two sisters did, we are never in a position to evaluate someone as being “better” or “worse” than us. The Bible has many examples of people who judged too much by first appearances only to find they should have looked deeper. The Pharaoh of Egypt (Exodus 5:1-2), Goliath (1 Samuel 17:43-44), Samuel (1 Samuel 16:6-7), and, of course, the religious and political contemporaries of Jesus’ own day come to mind (John 1:10).

As David so eloquently put it in Psalm 139 (1-18), God alone knows the truth:

You have searched me, Lord,
    and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
    you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down;
    you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue
    you, Lord, know it completely.
You hem me in behind and before,
    and you lay your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

Where can I go from your Spirit?
    Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
    if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
    if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
    your right hand will hold me fast.
If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
    and the light become night around me,”
even the darkness will not be dark to you;
    the night will shine like the day,
    for darkness is as light to you.

For you created my inmost being;
    you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful,
    I know that full well.
My frame was not hidden from you
    when I was made in the secret place,
    when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes saw my unformed body;
    all the days ordained for me were written in your book
    before one of them came to be.
How precious to me are your thoughts, God!
    How vast is the sum of them!
Were I to count them,
    they would outnumber the grains of sand—
    when I awake, I am still with you.

 

My advice for this devotional is next time you find yourself growing antagonistic toward someone, whether it be an individual or a group, and you find yourself starting to “put motives into their heads” without having much to back it up rather than your own fears and suspicions, try to pause and think a bit more about it first. You’ll find people are more like you than you realize.

Suggested Prayer: “Lord God, I praise you for, as your servant David said, you alone know who I am and see inside me at all times. You alone know and understand the hearts of everyone. Please forgive me for all the times I felt in a position to judge the worth of anyone as a person, especially when those times led me to withhold good or hand out evil to anyone unjustly. In all ways with all people, grant me eyes to see the world as you do, to feel for people as you do, and to respond as you would. Gratefully in Jesus’ Name, Amen.”

My Little Devotional #144: “Tact-Tical Choices”

Tags

Applejack, Bible, Christian Life, Christianity, confrontation, devotional, God, Honest Apple, honesty, hostility, inspirational, Jesus, motivational, My Little Pony, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, New Testament, Old Testament, opinion, Rarity, tact

Inspiration for Today’s Devotional: “Honest Apple”

Out of all the “virtues” the Mane Six display, the one who has a virtue that ends up being a double-edged sword more than anyone else is Applejack with her honesty. On one hand, it means she’s always trustworthy and you can take what she says as face value, which is a rare benefit for anyone. Yet the flip side of that is that she shows little care about giving her honest opinion about anything, such as in this episode when she was invited to judge a fashion show and didn’t bother hiding in the least her thoughts that fashion was a silly pursuit to begin with. In doing so, she ended up being rude, insulting, and callous to the various participants, and all while defending that she was just giving her honest opinion. It wasn’t until Rarity confronted her with someone who also had no qualms about being honest with her personal opinions about apples that Applejack got a dose of her own medicine and realized her mistake.

One of Winston Churchill’s many  noteworthy quotes was: “Tact is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.” Tact is indeed a great virtue and one of the better talents to possess. It can make a lot of difference in how you talk to someone or, far more importantly, how you offer constructive criticism or call them out on something. And the effects, as shown in this episode, of not having tact are clear. It’s all part of the vital process of communication which, unlike what some may believe, is not simply spewing out words for people to hear and then, once done, you wait for them to stop talking to begin again. And it can make a major difference in what you’re trying to say.

On a personal note, I’ve seen people blow up and lose their temper before and be out of line for doing so. They’ve overreacted, gotten too mean, and at times it’s over something that was their own fault or negligence to begin with and now they’re taking it out on those around them. I’ve seen these same people be angrily confronted and called out on this same behavior just as loudly and fiercely. What do you think was the result? They got angrier in turn and everything escalated. By comparison, I’ve also seen someone far calmer, more rational, and who went ahead and deferred to them a bit confront them in a far gentler way that de-escalated the situation. While they stayed irritable for a time, they were able to calm down in that instance, and once they were calm they apologized for their behavior of their own accord. In both cases they were being confronted about their outrageous behavior, but one made the situation worse and one made it better. And it all came down to tact and presentation.

The problem is that tact is not only a lost art nowadays, it seems to be one that people are actively trying to kill. As I’ve mentioned before, one of the drawbacks to humanity reaching the point where we can communicate with each other about everything worldwide in an instant is that we’ve gotten the false sense that our opinions are worth more than simple opinions. As a result, people have gotten louder about pushing their viewpoints across as well as shouting down those who are in opposition to them. Likewise, they’ve gotten more critical and less accepting of any divergent views, and more hostile about promoting their own. In short, people care less about swaying others to their point of view so much as making a point or putting something out so strong (even outlandish) that it garners a lot of attention…not necessarily support.

The worst part is that people excuse themselves more and more for this sort of behavior. Sometimes they defend themselves like Applejack; insisting they’re just stating their honest opinion. Yet like her, often this is a thinly veined way of saying (or at least giving the impression) that their opinion is the “right opinion”, and that everyone else who disagrees is silly, stupid, and/or morally in the wrong.

And when it comes to Christians, they might end up turning to Lord Jesus Himself as defense for the way they say things. They make a point that Jesus and the original Christians never worried about being “politically correct”, but often spoke out boldly and defiantly in the face of those that persecuted them. They also make a point that preaching the Gospel often enraged people in the past (and does even in the present) to the point of violence and oppression breaking out, so any negative attention they receive is not only viewed as acceptable but, in some cases, a sign of virtue. I’ve encountered a few Christians before who seemed to think they should have been getting people mad, or they weren’t preaching the Gospel correctly.

I think it’s certainly true that the Gospel has the power to create conflict between believers and non-believers, and inevitably will just as Jesus foretold. “Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword.” (Matthew 10:34) And it’s true that many of the actions that Jesus and the early Christians did called out people on their sin and, as a result, led to anger and hostility. “When the members of the Sanhedrin heard this (Stephen’s witness), they were furious and gnashed their teeth at him. But Stephen, full of the Holy Spirit, looked up to heaven and saw the glory of God, and Jesus standing at the right hand of God. “Look,” he said, “I see heaven open and the Son of Man standing at the right hand of God.” At this they covered their ears and, yelling at the top of their voices, they all rushed at him, dragged him out of the city and began to stone him.” (Acts 7:54-58) And it’s also true that some people will not only not accept Jesus’ Offer of Salvation but will try to violently suppress those who preach it. (There’s no need of a Bible verse for this; it happens around the world.)

Nevertheless, neither Jesus nor His disciples used the same “approach” for everyone; either individuals or groups. When Jesus met the Samaritan woman at the well, He didn’t immediately call her out for being a harlot and tell her to repent for the Kingdom of Heaven was at hand. He started things off by simply asking her to give Him a drink–to commit a basic violation of ethnic custom by associating with a Jew. (John 4:1-26) Nor did Jesus always point out sin and its consequences in others. Rather, he often spoke in parables, which served as a way for people to be able to see the wrong they were doing without them growing defensive as it wasn’t directly about them. (Matthew 13:34; 21:45) Paul didn’t immediately denounce all the numerous pagan temples and shrines the Athenians had erected when he met with them, even though he was outraged by them, but rather leveraged them into his own message by finding common ground with them. (Acts 17:16-34)

The same thing can be said about trying to make your point to anyone or to preach the Gospel to anyone. There are ways that will immediately make some people turn you off and shut you out; doing the opposite of what you intend and causing them to cling to their own viewpoint more. But there are also ways of finding common ground or recasting what you say to make it easier to accept or at least consider. While some pooh-pooh this sort of thing for not being “direct” enough, and in some cases they might be right, what one has to remember is the goal of persuasive speaking. It’s not about converting someone to your viewpoint on the spot, and it’s definitely not about making yourself feel good or clever. The point should be to get people to consider what you’re witnessing. If you can get someone to seriously think about what you’re telling them, whether it be your opinion on something or the Gospel of Jesus, you’ve already come a lot farther than you think.

Suggested Prayer: “Lord God, thank you for your saving Word and the message of the Gospel, which is nothing less than the salvation of all the world and hope for new and everlasting life. I ask again that I may always “speak the truth in love” when I am sharing this good news, and that while I acknowledge not everyone will always necessarily receive it, let me always proclaim it as you would have it proclaimed; and always out of genuine love, affection, and concern for all people–for indeed all people have been created by you and your pleasure, Christian and non-Christian alike. Gratefully in Jesus’ Name, Amen.”

My Little Devotional #143: “To Be or Not to Be”

Tags

being yourself, Bible, change, Christian Life, Christianity, devotional, God, inspirational, Jesus, motivational, My Little Pony, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, New Testament, Old Testament, righteousness, salvation, self-image, self-improvement, sin

Inspiration for Today’s Devotional: “Hard to Say Anything”

In this episode, Big Macintosh ended up following some bad, however well-meant, advice. When trying to show Sugar Belle how much he cared about her, he ended up going with the CMCs who, being little girls, suggested a number of ways that were ultimately derived from fantasy storybooks rather than represented real life. As a result of using them to “compete” with a rival suitor, he ended up offending and angering her more than anything. It wasn’t until he finally relied more on his own talents and used them to build a larger display case for her store, just like she had mentioned she wanted to him, showing himself off rather than an individual he thought she would like, that he finally got her affections.

The lesson from this episode is arguably about “being yourself”. That’s a lesson that everyone teaches, both secular and religious, from when we’re little kids up and to adulthood. Yet as a Christian, I often wonder, and I imagine many others do, if this is advice Christianity actually endorses.

The best way I can phrase it succinctly is from one of those old ’50s videos they used to show children on how to not only do things but pretty much to instruct them in “how to function in our society”. There was one I remember in particular that said: “you should be yourself…just so long as it’s your best self”. That sort of phrase can be taken a lot of ways. On one hand, it can simply be to not show off the worst aspects of your personality. On the other, it could be saying: “here’s what a good individual is, so be like that rather than how you really are”. This is the same message I get from much of Christianity.

I struggled with this for years and I still do a lot sometimes. Much of the core of Christianity is toward self-improvement, no matter how much it might claim contrary. In spite of the emphasis on the Grace of God and the magnitude of Christ Jesus’ sacrifice, as well as the assertion that we do not go to Heaven by our own merits but only by the Blood of Jesus, the Bible nevertheless emphasizes heavily the need to not be our old selves but to make changes, possibly huge ones, to be “more like Christ”. “What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? By no means! We are those who have died to sin; how can we live in it any longer?” (Romans 6: 1-2); “For the grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people. It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age,” (Titus 2:11-12); “That, however, is not the way of life you learned when you heard about Christ and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.” (Ephesians 4:20-24); “Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.”” (Matthew 16:24); ““Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven.”” (Matthew 7:21). For all the emphasis on “faith alone”, the New Testament is rife with not only the call to change but what seems to be the actual need to do it.

That caused me, and I’m assuming many young Christians who dug into the Word, no end of grief. It seemed chop-logic to me at points. I interpreted this as I’m supposed to rely totally on Jesus’ Sacrifice to cover my sin and yet, at the same time, if I didn’t lead a morally righteous life it would nullify or “disqualify” my salvation. To me, that, and the weak answers I got in some cases to explain it, didn’t seem to be too far off from making it a matter of “earning” my own salvation again. Yet much worse than that, it got me to start doubting some of what I was hearing. I started to reason…God supposedly loves me just as I am, and yet he wants me to become this perfect individual when the fact of the matter is I’m not like a lot of people in the Bible. If I had to become someone more like Jesus or Paul, I could tell that I would have a lot to change; not just in behavior but more importantly in my personality, mannerisms, and aptitudes. And if I had to become like that to be “acceptable” to God, then how could I go around thinking God truly accepted me just as I was? Not to mention the frustration and irritation of trying to conform to that image was enough to drive a person mad…and it nearly did in my case.

I heard a number of other messages concerning this over the years. I think many of them had part of the answer I was looking for, but they didn’t have the sum answer, and I wasn’t able to come to that until many years later and, at this point, it’s something I have difficulty training myself to accept mentally. The bottom line is that while a new Christian must temper themselves to avoid sin and pursue righteousness, to hold themselves to a higher standard than before (namely God’s standard)…they’re still human. And we will continue to be human until we fully attain to God’s Promise, which won’t happen in this life. It’s not a matter of we will probably get it wrong; we will get it wrong. We’ll keep ending up choosing sin over the will of God, and we’ll keep failing to do good when we should have.

It doesn’t make it “right”, but it reminds us again of Christ’s Sacrifice. When we feel discouraged or hopeless or never able to live up to that standard, the Bible says: “Of course you won’t. You couldn’t before and you can’t now. That’s why Lord Jesus died for you to begin with. Yet Christ’s Sacrifice has covered you, and you remain a Child of God in his sight in spite of this.” While trying to aspire to be sinless and righteous is a noble aspiration, to assign it enough importance to be key for salvation is not only folly but vanity. It’s Christ who makes us perfect, not us. To think that we can become perfectly like Him when still in the flesh is pride and sinful. Instead, what the Blood of Jesus does for us is enables us to never give up and keep on trying; reminding us that no matter how little we feel of ourselves or how far we think we’ve fallen and how much the rest of mankind and the world looks down on us, we are still holy and precious in the eyes of God. We are still beloved as we are.

And that is what ultimately inspires us to be our best selves and to aspire for greater. That is what sets us free, both from sin…and from our own condemnation.

Suggested Prayer: “Lord God, thank you for the eternally precious blood of your Son, our Lord, Jesus Christ, who by the power of His Sacrifice has conquered all sin, all condemnation, all judgment, and all death. To Him and His Name be glory forever and ever. Please help me to embrace the magnitude of this marvelous free gift, and grant that I may never cheapen His Majesty and Glory by focusing only on improving myself to try to make myself ‘pleasing’ to you. His Sacrifice has already accomplished that. Gratefully in Jesus’ Name, Amen.”

My Little Devotional #142: “Attitude of Ingratitude”

Tags

anger, Bible, Christian Life, Christianity, discontent, frustration, God, gratitude, ingratitude, Jesus, malcontent, My Little Pony, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, New Testament, Old Testament, parents, Rainbow Dash, Scootaloo, thankfulness

Inspiration for Today’s Devotional: “Parental Glideance”

Rainbow Dash may have had at least something of a point with her reaction in this episode. It’s true that her parents were being a little overbearing, even if they had the best intentions. There does come a point where cheering and support end up not only a bit overdone but also a bit of an embarrassment, and it was clear that her parents had crossed that line. There’s no need to herald the accomplishments of your child for every little act they do, after all.

That being said, she handled it inappropriately. She could have been far calmer and more rational about how she told them that their attempts at support, however well-meant, were drawing unwanted attention and were, honestly, embarrassing themselves as much as her. Blowing up at them was too much. But aside from that, Scootaloo did make a good point. As annoyed as she might have been with parents who were over-supportive, she at least had parents that were supportive to begin with as opposed to parents who didn’t even care. Not to mention that Rainbow Dash does suffer from a bit of an inferiority complex. The fact her parents were always there to be happy for her no matter how she did led her to never get so bogged down in her failures that she didn’t keep trying harder. She failed to appreciate that; focusing all of her emotion and anger instead on what she didn’t like and let that distort her view of her parents as a whole.

One of the big problems with the human psyche as we go about in day to day life, as I have said in early devotionals, is that no matter how good we have things going for us we tend to fixate only on the aspect of something we don’t like. I’m more well off than most of the people in the world, with a means to support myself, savings, my health, and no debt. The sort of lifestyle a lot of people wish they would have. Yet there are times, like when it’s raining three days in a row or I hit every stop light when I’m already running a bit late to work, that I’ll get so ungrateful I’ll angrily swear and yell “why does this have to happen to me?”. I’ll go off on an enraged rant about some minor and temporary inconvenience right in the comfort of my own home in front of my computer and home from my job…literally in the midst of all of my blessings. I’ll get sour about not being able to go somewhere I had planned this weekend when I’m surrounded by “favors” I’ve done myself on countless other weekends. Most of all, I’ll sometimes focus on a bad habit or character trait that annoys me about people I love, and it will ruin times we spend together or events we attend together even though, when alone, I’ll constantly lament that I don’t spend as much time with them as I should.

Even when I do suffer a bit of genuine misfortune I tend to lose sight of the big picture. Like when my car battery got damaged and ended up being a special battery that needed not only an expensive model but also a professional to replace, I didn’t focus on the fact that I could easily afford it, that I had access to alternatives thanks to my relatives, or even the nice bonus that this all happened on a weekend so I didn’t have to worry about work. No, I instead got upset that it had happened at all and that I couldn’t call anyone to tow it until the next day or do it myself. I let it ruin everything else for that night even though I hadn’t even planned on going anywhere other than the nearby convenient mart.

I’ll go ahead and say I’m one of the worst offenders for ingratitude because I always focus on certain things and ignore all others. Yet I’ve run into many other individuals before who had much to be thankful for (sometimes more than they deserved…) and yet they wallowed in continuous discontent and anger about the things they didn’t have that they felt were denied them. And I’ve known many more who lose their temper about their friends and family before at things they’ve done and let those carry over into full-blown fights or lingering discontent.

This is one of my worst flaws and one I need to focus more on resolving, because an attitude of ingratitude not only makes me a malcontent, a grouch, and not appreciate what I have–it can be downright sinful.

One would argue if they were one of the ancient Israelites in the Books of Exodus and Numbers that they would have had plenty to be happy about. They had been delivered from Egypt by the Hand of God himself, were promised a land to build a nation of their own, defended from enemies on every side, and were given food and water throughout their long journey through what could only be described as miracles. Yet all they constantly focused on was how they were having to travel through the desert such a long way, and, to their own detriment, they very often gave voice to their loud complaints. It eventually led to all of the adults of the original Exodus perishing in the desert without setting foot on the Promised Land, because of fixating so much on their remaining problems they didn’t see what they had spread before them. They ended up losing the blessing of God; as a warning to all of us who might similarly throw something of value away over one aspect we dislike about it.

Likewise, King Solomon possessed wealth and wisdom beyond that of any king who had ever lived…and yet it wasn’t enough for him. He constantly looked for new wives to sate his desires, and in finding new ones he eventually found ones that persuaded him to turn to idolatrous worship and away from God–the very one who gave him all of his wealth and wisdom to begin with. As a result, the unified Kingdom of Israel didn’t last any longer than him. (1 Kings 11:1-13)

In less extreme examples that hit closer to home, we all know (or maybe we are) people who constantly go around lamenting things they don’t have. Rarely can you count on these people to give of their time or talents to a good cause, let alone the ministry of the Gospel. Rarely do they feel in a good attitude to help anyone else out who’s in need or in trouble. Often they can’t be bothered to witness in any capacity. And, as illustrated in this episode, whenever they meet with a mild misfortune they overreact, possibly just to a situation but in worse cases toward well-meaning individuals who didn’t realize any better. At that point, not only are they not willing to do any part to minister the Gospel, but they’re actively sinning by going around in a sour mood and taking it out on others.

As a suggested prayer for today, and something to help tie this together, I’d like to quote a rather poignant poem (by unknown, unfortunately; many people have claimed to be the author):

“Today upon a bus I saw a lovely maiden with golden hair;

I envied her—so beautiful, and how, I wished I were so fair;

When suddenly she rose to leave, I saw her hobble down the aisle;

She had one foot and wore a crutch, but as she passed, she wore a smile.

Oh God, forgive me when I whine,

I have two feet –the world is mine.

And when I stopped to buy some sweets, the lad who served me had such charm;

he seemed to radiate good cheer, his manner was so kind and warm;

I said, “it’s nice to deal with you, such courtesy I seldom find;”

He turned and said, “Oh, thank you sir.” And then I saw that he was blind.

Oh, God, forgive me when I whine,

I have two eyes, the world is mine.

Then when walking down the street, I saw a child with eyes of blue;

He stood and watched the others play, it seemed he knew not what to do;

I stopped a moment, then I said, “Why don’t you join the others, dear?

He looked ahead without a word, I realized –he could not hear.

Oh God, forgive me when I whine,

I have two ears, the world is mine

With feet to take me where I’d go,

with eyes to see the sunsets glow,

with ears to hear what I would know,

I am blessed indeed. The world is mine.

Oh God, forgive me when I whine.”

My Little Devotional #141: “Carry On Wayward Son”

Tags

Bible, children, Christian Life, Christianity, devotional, Filly Forever, God, growing up, inspirational, Jesus, maturity, motivational, My Little Pony, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, New Testament, Old Testament, parents, Rarity, rebellion, sin, Sweetie Belle, teaching, waywardness

Inspiration for Today’s Devotional: “Filly Forever”

Sometimes for better, sometimes for worse, sometimes it’s praiseworthy, sometimes it’s worth condemnation, sometimes it’s little, sometimes it’s big, and, in my opinion, belief in it is what measures your degree of faith in humanity: people change. And nowhere is that change felt more prominently by a parent or family member than in the change in a loved one from child to adult.

Rarity, as an older sister, had to face that in this episode when, in her attempt to spend some quality time with her little sister Sweetie Belle, she found out the hard way she wasn’t exactly the same pony she grew up with anymore. Yet as any long-time parent will tell you, staying connected with your loved ones as they get older isn’t always as simple as getting into their new interests, such as this episode presented.

I myself don’t have children so I won’t presume to know the full impact of what it’s like to have my kids grow up, but I’ve known some people for years as I’ve watched them grow and seen them become parents themselves. I can still recall the one point in my life where I took a look at a certain individual and came to the realization that I didn’t even recognize them anymore…and, sadly in this case, it wasn’t a better person than the old one. At first I was merely in denial, surprised by certain changes but assuming it was just a bad day or a weird mood, but as the years went on and I saw the relationship with his parents change, I grew more uncomfortable about it as I realized it was a personality shift. I spoke with the parents as well and I could see that they realized the same thing I realized, and it was devastating to them. They had tried their best to be good parents, sometimes succeeding and sometimes failing as many parents do, but I knew they had brought him up with a great deal of love, affection, and emphasis on responsibility. To watch them turn so different was a true shock to them, especially when he reached the point of his life that all teenagers did and started exerting his own independence, which led to, as expected, several broken rules, violations of trust, and eventually heated arguments.

Yet now I’m old enough to see individuals like this one have their own children, and I see even when their kids are barely moving into 1st grade the concerns are the same throughout the life of all parents. They’re always worried about them, especially when they misbehave or throw tantrums. All parents have times when they need to put their foot down and exert discipline…but there’s no parent, in my opinion, who wants to be in a position where their child is misbehaving so much that that’s all they do for an entire day. No parent, deep down inside, wants to “be the bad guy/gal”. Whether I’ve seen married couples or single parents, I’ve seen times when they’ve had to step out of the room so their children can’t see them lose their composure out of frustration as to what they’re doing wrong that their children are reacting to them this way, and they hate how they’re responding in turn. Children are often seen as symbols of innocence, but that means they can also be very cruel because they feel anything not directed at them doesn’t impact anyone else’s feelings. The most thoughtless thing a small child can do, thinking it’s a meaningless phrase or because they’re throwing a tantrum, is yell “I hate you” to their parents. I see these same parents, after hearing those words, fearing the years ahead and what it will mean when they become teenagers. Much like their parents before them, they’re worried that their rebellious streak will lead to a much greater rift or, as is often sensationalized by media stories, a host of nightmarish negative outcomes.

The good news is that the far majority of teenagers, for all the temptations and troubles out there and all the fears their parents experience, do make it through and to adulthood. The bad news is that doesn’t diminish the fear at the time, and, as part of growing up, everyone is going to have a point where they assert their independence and stop listening to mom and dad. In fact, there will probably be a long phase in the lives of most people, usually from late teens through mid-20s, where they’ll simply fully enjoy their “freedom” as adults and indulge in all of their fantasies while they’re young and have the ability to do so. It’s likely family will not figure into that very much.

However, I’ve also noticed in most cases that with age comes maturity. Things like marriage and childbirth force the old children, if they haven’t already, to start focusing on the important things in life and realize that they themselves are no longer on top. They start finding themselves overwhelmed with new problems and no experience, and then they start remembering they have people who aren’t their younger friends who have gone through the same things they now find themselves facing. As they sit around in houses of their own or tend to families of their own, they start feeling like something is missing that they only got from home. Parents and siblings slowly grow less annoying and more interesting. And it’s around these times, when a person grows wise enough to start making educated decisions and finds themselves faced with new problems, I see (if they came from a good family) these same individuals start to think back to what their parents or siblings would do, or how they taught them when they grew up.

The Bible says there is a season for all things. “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.” (Ecclesiastes 3:1-8) To supplement King Solomon’s famous dichotomy, I would add things like a time to be a child and a time to be an adult; a time to be rebellious and a time to be obedient; a time to run away from family and a time to come back to them; a time to be by oneself and a time to seek the company of others.  As I said to start with, people change. Sometimes it’s something late in life, but as part of growing up people change normally. They go from small, innocent, and yet self-interested and centered children to rebellious and experimental teenagers to (God willing) sensible and more empathetic adults. And we can’t always expect an individual in one phase to behave like an individual in another. Knowledge and good upbringing will only take one so far. Experience is something someone can only gain for themselves, and that is a “fruit” that one has to endure a long growing season to see become ripe.

We can’t know what the future holds for our children, but they also can’t be small and reliant on us forever. The day will come when they have to be on their own, and, on our part, we will have to let go and trust God.  And that won’t always be easy. When that day comes, all we can do is hope in the years ahead that they’ll come back.

But before that day comes, the best thing we can do is bring them up to be the best people they can be, holding true to a good example and promoting the Word. There are many testimonies with a common theme out there of people who recommitted their lives to Christ as adults after “seasons” of waywardness and sin–what began to turn them around was remembering how much their families tried to impress on them the importance of the Bible, church, and Lord Jesus, and they decided to go back once they hit bottom.  Likewise, in cases not so severe, on the day an individual gains experience and maturity to go along with their independence, people will remember what their families told them and showed them though they might have ignored such instruction for years.

In conclusion, my suggestion is to “sow your seed” well and be patient through the “growing seasons”. In due time, with commitment and trust to God, it will likely blossom.

Suggested Prayer: “Lord God, thank you for the gift of my loved ones each and every day; both in the days in which we embrace and the days in which we’re at each others throats. If I am going through a season where I find myself unable to connect with them, or I find myself forced to watch them from afar, I choose to commit my relationship with them to you with hope and faith that, with your divine assistance, we will come back together. And if I am fortunate enough to still have my loved ones close at hand, especially if I am a parent, please help me to encourage them every day to be good people who pursue eternal values…and grant that I let them know so that they remember every day of their lives that I love them. Gratefully in Jesus’ Name, Amen.”

My Little Devotional #140: “Stop Talking! I’m Trying to Hear You!”

Tags

Bible, Christian Life, Christianity, devotional, disrespect, empathy, Fluttershy, Fluttershy Leans In, frustration, God, ignoring, inspirational, Jesus, listening, motivational, My Little Pony, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, New Testament, Old Testament, paying attention, understanding

Inspiration for Today’s Devotional: “Fluttershy Leans In”

Following a gradual history of becoming more self-confident and seeing a need to be filled from the local veterinarian, Fluttershy finally decided to move forward with a dream of hers to build an animal sanctuary. Although this idea had existed solely as a dream for years, she had many concrete ideas for it; including an emphasis on being an open, nurturing, and safe space as opposed to something with bars, walls, and/or fenced in. Yet although she conveyed her ideas very clearly to the experts that she relied on for help, as the ideas were unusual they didn’t pay attention to her or try to match her concept; instead electing to take ideas that they thought were better and only put in a few tweaks that barely addressed Fluttershy’s desires. Although they were contrary to what she wanted, they simply assumed she’d like their way better on seeing it, and actually got offended when she didn’t. As a result, she ended up putting her hoof down and dismissing all of them, then started again from the ground up.

One of the traits of being a good Christian (or individual in general) that I think is one of those more “life-long-learning-processes” as opposed to a skill you can just pick up is also one of the most basic and important: learning to listen. It’s a trait that not only comes from personal habits and choices but often has to be tempered by watching your own emotions and demeanor in certain situations or with certain topics.

This particular episode hit a note with me in that regard. I’m an amateur writer, and one of my recent projects was editing another amateur writer’s work for him and putting in some revisions. Often in discussions he tells me exactly what he wants and is going for with a character or event…but me, being a writer myself with my own ideas of what I like and don’t like, I’m ashamed to admit that often I try to substitute my own ideas in and often without consulting him first or respecting his original intention. This episode served as a nice wake-up call to what I was doing; not listening and imposing my own preconceived thoughts and, more importantly, wants and desires onto what he was saying. There’s really no greater act of disrespect to an artist in any medium.

And, as anyone can tell you who has ever had to deal with someone like that, such a thing is abysmal. It is an incredible frustration to work with someone who you realize is just not listening to you. Whether it’s because they just heard the highlights of what you said or they simply sit still while you talk, essentially waiting for your lips to stop moving, and then ignore everything you said–nothing gives you quite the same sense of frustration, insult, and anger as people not listening to you. And the Bible has a healthy share of examples.

When Moses tried to lead the Israelites to the Promised Land, both he, Joshua, and Caleb told them how the Lord would be with them to help them triumph over all their foes, no matter how strong or numerous, but they wouldn’t listen and rebelled against the command to take the Promised Land. Yet after God informed them that their punishment would be that they would have to remain 40 years in the desert, specifically saying he wouldn’t be with them if they went up to try and take the Promised Land before then, what did they do? They tried to go up anyway, saying they were ready to obey the original command now. Naturally, Moses was now doubly frustrated, because they weren’t listening again, and they had just as disastrous a result as before  (Numbers 13-14).

I can only imagine the frustration of the elders who served under King Solomon when dealing with his son: the newly-crowned King Rehoboam. Although they gave him sound advice for how to quiet the discontent of his new subjects, he wouldn’t listen to it because it wasn’t what he wanted to hear and went with advisers who would tell him what he wanted. As a result? Israel’s kingdom split in two and never regained its former glory (1 Kings 12:1-20).

Then there was Paul and Barnabas in Lystra. They performed a miracle before the eyes of the people there in order to bring glory to God and promote the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Instead, however, the people didn’t listen and immediately thought their own pagan gods Zeus and Hermes had come in mortal form. The two were so frustrated by this reaction they tore their own clothes in protest (Acts 14: 8-18).

One of the greatest blunders I ever committed as a Christian was when I tried ministering to people online. I spent one evening talking to someone and tried to follow up the next day, but, as I said in my previous devotional, I was focused only on trying to say the right thing rather than trying to care about that person as an individual. I ended up not remembering what they had told me about themselves the day before, they immediately realized I hadn’t been listening, and…well, as you can imagine it was all downhill from there. As I said before, I should be caring about people first before I can expect to share the Gospel with them, and part of that is actually listening to people rather than looking for opportunities to spew Bible verses.

In closing, I’d like to end with one of my favorite anonymous poems, and I encourage you to take it to heart in your own devotional life or life in general:

“A wise old owl lived in an oak.

The more he saw, the less he spoke;

The less he spoke, the more he heard.

Why can’t we all be like that wise old bird?”

Suggested Prayer: “Lord God, thank you for all the people in my life who I have ever turned to when I have been in physical, mental, or life difficulties who have always patiently listened to me; accepting me, understanding my situation, and not offering any unsolicited advice.  Please help me to do the same to everyone I meet, and especially to those who come to me with their problems and entrust themselves to me. To coin an old proverb, as I have been blessed with one mouth and two ears, please grant that I listen twice as much as I speak. Gratefully in Jesus’ Name, Amen.”